Christian Kitsch: Witnessing With Bible Tracts
When I came across this little jewel I knew not whether to laugh or cry. My friends, I introduce you to the humors and horros of Chick Publications.
A noble, God-fearing man has embarked on a quest to help well-intentioned, but far too meek Christian evangelicals spread the Good News of Jesus Christ. How? Through Christian tracts. Learn how to witness to all of your friends!
Shopping? Hand a tract to the chasier, leave a tract in the changing room or slip a tract into the pockets of unpurchased clothes! Want to witness from home? Leave tracts on the coffee table for guests or slip a tract into the envelope when you pay your bills!
Want to share your faith, but too mild mannered to do it? Just leave a tract. Learn how to witness to a Muslim*,
learn how to save your Catholic friends from the pits of hell,
and learn never to misunderestimate the power of a Holy Ghost Fire Filled Grandmother:
! Wowsa. Right now, I wish Gutenberg had never been born. Even as a Christian, I was often infuriated by the witnessing techniques of my fellow believers. Bible tracts? Are you serious? Since I turned sixteen, I have worked on and off at a local Resort & Conference Center. During the summers Christian groups would come through every week. As I waited on them during meals, there was never anything more frustrating than receiving from them Bible tracts. Many of them actually left a “Tip” tract in lieu of leaving a tip. Its so terribly ridiculous that it almost makes you want to cry. As an aside, the Smart Cards are by far my favorite:
As anyone who reads this blog regularly knows, I attend a small Christian university in rural Ohio. Less that ten minutes away is another small, liberal arts college (and if I may so, a much more prestigious and respectable institution it is). It is commonly held belief that the students there are heathens, and many a good Christian from my school have devised ways to witness to them.
I remember still with a not-so-slight degree of disgust a chapel two years ago in which a student speaking in chapel rallied some troops to journey with him to our neighbors during a weekend to witness to the partiers. For those who were not so bold as to crash parties and share Jesus, there was plenty an opportunity to leave Bible tracts on every single car on their campus.
Seriously, who thinks this is effective?*Note: Do NOT attempt this in Saudi Arabia.